Deck the halls with balls of Kleenex! yes, it’s that most wonderful time of the year again…flu season! Once again, I neglected to get a flu shot, relying on my interferon pumped immune system to get me through the winter without a single day of bed rest. Unfortunately, I made the mistake of jinxing myself by pointing out to my wife that I haven’t had the flu or even a teensy cold (allergies don’t count right?) for the last TWO years! 48 hours later I woke up to find myself so fatigued and achy that I had to get back into bed, which suddenly reminds me of a song by Ian Dury and the Blockheads called Reasons to be Cheerful, where the back-up singers happily wail to a disco beat “Why doncha get back into bed? Why doncha get back into bed?”
Which is exactly what I did, and consequently had an unpaid (by me), unproductive (except for the New York Times crossword) sick day. Ick day. However, were it not for the compounded interest jinx fee I’d have to pay if I came right out and said that my immune system rallied true to form and handily defeated a battalion of tiny spiked tennis balls that are commonly known as influenza viruses, let me just say this: Vitamin C. And not just any form of Vitamin C either! Nosirree…none of those fake capsules and tablets that could be Vitamin F or U or K for all you know. No glass of juice (from concentrate) that’s strained to the point where you wouldn’t be able to guess what fruit it came from in a blind taste test. No, take it from a viral ninja tenth degree black&blue belt–only one daily supplement is required to keep you on your feet and hammering boards across all your doors and windows to fend off all the zombie hoards of flu sufferers who want what YOU have:
ORANGEBERRY! And brains. What kind of brains? The kind of brains that heat-seeks the very best in daily entertainment, courtesy of their kick-ass-take-names-big-bad-Book-of-Paul-blog-tour!
Hmmm…it might be a too late for you. Open wider and say: AHHHHRRRRGGGH!!
